In Time, Bel Ami, Screwed

Yup, the blog is back! Hope you enjoy this latest round of reviews, more will follow.


#1 - IN TIME

Stars - Justin Timberlake, Cillian Murphy, Amanda Seyfried, Olivia Wilde, Matt Bomer

Director - Andrew Niccol

Memorable Quote - 'For a few to be immortal, many must die.'

Review - This is one that will certainly make you think. The concept is one that is wholly new (pretty rare for Hollywood), and this means that you really are never sure what to expect from each twist and turn. I loved the idea of time being a currency, as it really does bring in some great possibilities; and apart from some obvious plot holes, it was not a bad effort at all. Timberlake actually convinces as an actor these days and one can almost forget that he was a pop star, while Seyfried was unrecognisable and had all the (appropriate) naive charm of an actress in her first role. All in all, a great idea with a satisfying ending (and generally speaking, anything with Cillian Murphy in it gets a big thumbs up from me). 4.5/5

#2 - BEL AMI

I look at you with my vampire face

Stars - Robert Pattinson, Uma Thurman, Christina Ricci, Kristin Scott Thomas

Director - Declan Donnellan and Nick Ormerod

Memorable Quote - "I've been such a fool."

Review - I had to study Maupassant in my French A-Levels, and I loved the guy. I also hate Robert Pattinson, so I had no idea how this one was going to turn out. In the end, I found Pattinson as repulsive and dull as ever; but the plot was witty, clever, and neat, with all of the other parts fitting together brilliantly. I suppose it turned out exactly as I could have predicted. I'm also quite sure that hating Pattinson actually is what the character requires, because he is not likeable at all. 3/5
p.s. Pro tip: Never search "Bel Ami" in Google images with safe search turned off, because apparently there is a rather... dubious company which produces films of a different nature under that name. None of them, thankfully, star Robert Pattinson.

#3 - SCREWED

Stars - James D'Arcy, Noel Clarke, Frank Harper, Joseph Gilgun (for all of two background scenes), Andrew Shim

Director - Reg Traviss

Memorable Quote - I CAN'T REMEMBER BECAUSE I WAS TOO ANGRY ABOUT ANDREW SHIM

Review - Seriously, seriously, why do people keep giving Milky Andrew Shim acting jobs? HE CANNOT ACT. He could not act if every single person he knew was about to die and acting would save them. He could not act if you gave him fifteen million pounds. Just STOP putting him in movies and ruining them with his wooden hammy delivery of lines and primary school drama club expressions! He is not even hilarious like Nicolas Cage! He is just awful! Alright, rant over, because once again he was the only black mark on an otherwise excellent movie. D'Arcy is absolutely wonderful in this as the soldier who finds it hard to adjust, and turns to things he shouldn't to get by, while the plot twist at the end is just beautifully executed. It may look like a prison drama but it is only masquerading - this is a murder mystery, and make no bones about it. 4/5

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